Lost for thoughts

Sometimes the yawning abyss of no more sharing with you, no more holding you and no more being with you is unfathomable. As in I literally struggle to get my head around you not being here. There remain infinite occasions where you’d be in your element, bringing your unique slant to them not to mention that gentle beaming grin. Instead I still rattle through like a stubborn bowling ball down an empty alley.  

Maybe the weather is getting to me today. Maybe the lessening daylight and the increase in work pressure is at me. Maybe I’m realising what’s coming - holidays and empty spaces.

Whatever it is, I thought I was prepared. I’m not so sure any more.