I'm 35 years old and I'm a widower

As sentences go the sentence I have written as the title of this post is one that is rarely expressed. Lives are meant to be lived fully and until old age, with couples knitting hopes and dreams together along a meandering path. Myself and Liane were optimistic dreamers with all sorts of plans; to renovate our house, to raise a family, to travel the world with a young child/children, to swim when grown old and wrinkly and to be there for one another through sickness and through health.

We'd spoken about death but it was always something distant, something remote and something that would happen after we'd completed our dreams. Now it is my present. The suddenness and the severity is a lot to take in. The shock, the grief and the daily reality too. Coming to terms with my new path will be a long process and one I hope to charter here for you to share. I truly believe that good will come of all this hurt and sorrow and hope that the months ahead will show that belief to be true.

For now, it is one step at a time.